Stuff, stuff and more stuff

Gone are the days of spontaneously deciding to go for an ice cream, coffee, movie, you name it. Now I have to take stuff with me everywhere. Not my stuff, but baby N stuff. The diaper bag has replaced my purse. A cool, gender-neutral, black diaper bag so that David is not ashamed to carry it. It's actually a really cool bag, with big and small pockets, a diaper changing mat, and a insulated pocket to keep a bottle cool.

The first time David took baby N in to the doctor by himself, he came home and sheepishly admitted that alas, he had forgotten the ever important bag at home. Of course it was not that big of a deal, a pediatrician's office surely has no shortage of extra diapers. And dads get a little more slack for things like that. I rolled my eyes and teased him a little. I should have held my tongue, however, because when my mom and I took N in for the next appointment, we sat down and looked around and realized that we too had forgotten the diaper bag! The lesson learned? Moms and grandmas are just as fallible as dads. And forgetting the diaper bag is not a tragedy.

My packing skill will soon be put to the test when N and I hop on a plane for the Midwest this Friday. I have to admit I am a little nervous about juggling luggage, security, and a baby. I am hoping he will be good on the plane and keep the screaming to a minimum. Or else I end up the punchline of someone's comedy routine (a la Jeffrey's mom from one of Cosby's classics).

One more thing. Aren't pacifiers amazing? For pacify they surely can. The crying stops, the eyes start to close. Amazing.

I'm back!

Hi all. I'm back from several weeks of life-changing moments. Labor and delivery, bringing home a baby, and saying goodbye to a full night's sleep.

Everyone tells you that being a mother is hard, but really, it is HARD. Hard as in living with constant exhaustion. Hard as in holding a writhing, screaming body and not being sure what to do about it. Hard as in trying to find 15 extra minutes to take a shower. But then I look at his sweet, sleeping face or I get a fleeting smile from him, and I completely forget about the H-A-R-D.

I've never been so appreciative of family. My aunt and uncle have been wonderful, bring us rotisserie chickens, pizza, quarters for laundry, you name it. And taking turns trying to calm little N when he is upset. And my parents have come down to visit a couple of times already. Watching grandparents with their grandchildren is a delight. I can't believe how good my mom is with him. When she talks to him he stares at her, fascinated. He stares the same way at his toy alligator. And his cow.

I have to start getting up earlier, because Baby N has his happy time when he first gets up, around 7am. Up to this point, his dad has been watching him while he gets ready for work, while I sleep a little longer, catching up from getting up in the middle of the night. But I keep hearing how cute he was, how he was smiling and laughing. So I think I have to suck it up and try to get up with them so I can see these adorable smiles.

Well my blog my take a different tone now that my universe has shifted. I probably won't be getting out as often. But that's okay because home has become much more interesting as of late.

Insomnia

It's 5 o'clock in the morning, and I have been tossing and turning for about an hour. Tossing and turning figuratively, that is, because at this point my belly is too big for me to do it physically. It is a complex process to turn over now, which requires the transition of several pillows, an accidental elbow jab in David's back (who has taken up the use of earplugs because apparently I now snore), and some grunting.

I have gained just over 30 pounds now, all in my belly, and it's amazing what carrying that kind of weight does to you. Swollen legs, sore knees, you name it. Oh well, only six weeks to go.